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Professor Wrestling: 'Unforgiven' Results

Edge Meets Cena For Belt In TLC Match

POSTED: 7:26 pm PDT September 14, 2006

Listen up!

Class is in session.

This past Sunday night, it was pay-per-view time again as the "Raw" crew invaded Toronto for "Unforgiven."

So what happened, and how were my stellar predictions? Let's get to it!

Challenge Match: Carlito vs. Randy Orton
What Should Happen: Carlito doesn't cut it as a babyface for me. He's a much funnier heel. Orton, meanwhile, seems stuck in neutral. In a sense, this is a match between two guys in WWE Purgatory. If I were writing the show, I'd instruct both to do the best they can to steal the show. I'm not sure it can happen at this point.

What Will Happen: I think Carlito will come close, but ultimately lose to Orton.

What Did Happen: Orton wins with an RKO.

Intercontinental Title Match: Johnny Nitro (c) vs. Jeff Hardy
What Should Happen: It wouldn't be a sin to give Hardy the title here. But if this is going to be a series of matches, I'd rather have the babyface chase the heel. If that's the case, I'd book Nitro to go over.

What Will Happen: Nitro retains.

What Did Happen: Nitro's valet/manager, Malena, interfered. Nitro won.

Challenge Match: Umaga vs. Kane
What Should Happen: Who is the real monster of WWE? Stephanie. Sorry, cheap shot. I'm sure she's a nice lady backstage. As for this match, Umaga should win, naturally. Why build up a monster just to have him lose his first big test?

What Will Happen: Umaga chokes out Kane for the victory.

What Did Happen: Both monsters brawled to the back, which resulted in a double-countout. So in effect, no one won -- and no one lost. I hate that when I'm paying for a product, as opposed to getting it free on TV.

WWE Women's Championship Match: Lita (c) vs.Trish Stratus
What Should Happen: Stratus is supposedly going to retire after the match. If that's the case, and since this is her hometown of Toronto, it makes sense to let her go out on top. That's what I would do. But then again, I'm a softy.

What Will Happen: Vince McMahon is not. Remember the last time a popular Canadian tried to go out on top in his homeland? Bret Hart spit on Vince. Lita wins.

What Did Happen: Trish beat Lita with Bret Hart's sharpshooter finisher. The Canadian crowd goes wild! I guess McMahon isn't such a bad guy after all.

World Tag Team Championship: The Spirit Squad (c) vs. The Highlanders
What Should Happen: The art of tag team wrestling is totally lost on this promotion, which is kind of sad. This is little more than a freak show, but if it were up to me I'd let TSS do something else. It may even be time to split 'em up. Here, I think the comedy duo in kilts should win. It's not a good choice, to be perfectly honest.

What Will Happen: The Highlanders will find a way to overcome the 5-on-2 odds.

What Did Happen: The Highlanders couldn't find a way to overcome the 5-on-2 odds, and lost. TSS retains.

Hell In A Cell Match: Vince and Shane McMahon and Big Show vs. Triple H and Shawn Michaels.
What Should Happen: This is an against-all-odds match, so I'm sure Vince will empty out the WWE locker room for help when it looks like his team will lose. That sounds fine to me, since this is a gimmick match anyway. It would be nice to see how DX would fare against a real stable of wrestling heels, rather than the owners of the promotion.

What Will Happen: DX will win it. This feud is going nowhere, and McMahon knows it. It's time to move on.

What Did Happen: No big interference from the back, but DX won. And yes, it's time to move on.

WWE Championship Match: Edge (c) vs. John Cena
What Should Happen: Cena will be too busy promoting his new movie ("The Marine") to carry the title. So look for him on the season premiere of "Smackdown!" on the new CW network. That's where he's going after he loses this tables, ladders and chairs match. I mean, why would they make this a stipulation if they weren't going to go through with it?

What Will Happen: It's the lock of the night: Edge retains in his hometown of Toronto.

What Did Happen: I hope you didn't bet the mortgage. Cena tossed Edge through two tables, then climbed a ladder to regain his gold.

That'll do it. Out of seven matches: three right, three wrong and one tie, as the Umaga-Kane mess was undecided (I refuse to take a loss on that one, kids.) All in all, a .500 night. Not perfect, but I'm still hitting better than SI cover boy Joe Mauer.

Coming soon: Are you ready for the "Old School, New School" Professor Wrestling podcast? I am.

Now scram.

Class dismissed!

(Professor Wrestling is a masked employee of Internet Broadcasting. Got a question, comment, complaint? E-mail him right here. )



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