March 15, 2007

Seattle, Washington

I've been back from Vietnam for 3 days now and the jet lag is finally starting to wear off. Every night, though, the images and faces of this remarkable country vividly return. Kaleidoscopic images rotate gently through my dreams--brilliant green rice paddies, chidren's voices, a dainty hand gripping mine, shimmering heat, bobbing conical hats, the ebb and flow throb of motorcycles... Vietnam has a way of getting under your skin. It's a place that's impossible to forget.

I personally believe we westerners do ourselves a huge injustice thinking one-sidedly about Vietnam--that it is the only one that can benefit from a close relationship with America. Yes, Vietnam is looking for foreign investments to grow the economy, its hundreds of orphans need homes, their citizens deserve better medical care, and the country certainly needs help to clean up the poison we left behind known as Agent Orange. No doubt Vietnam could also use a hand up when it comes to urban planning, environmental problems, technology, protecting children against human trafficking, and something as simple as how to run electricity to homes and businesses. (You should see the birds nest mess of criss-crossing wires on their utility poles!) So, yes, the needs there are huge. But what is it we can learn from them?

One of the most intriguing characteristics of the Vietnamese people is their slowness to anger. You see it every day in the mob of motorcycles that zoom and zip through the cities. The scooters stop without warning, turn in front of you, go the wrong way, cut you off, tailgate, weave through pedestrians, carts, bicycles, and trucks and generally do just about everything wrong according to OUR laws here in the U.S. It's absolute bedlam. But in Vietnam, no one yells, swears, makes an obscene gesture, or EVER pulls out a gun and shoots an offender. I saw several occasions when one vehicle tapped into another, crunching a fender, or cut it too close and scraped a side mirror. The drivers barely reacted, maybe glanced at the damage and just kept on heading to wherever they're going. Son Michael Pham explains the phenomenon. He says "Vietnamese people believe it is embarassing to show anger. It is a revelation to others that you are weak." Seems to me we could use a little more of that here, don't you think?

I could rave on and on about so many things--like the fantastic food--unparalleled in Southeast Asia; the stunning landscapes where young girls in white ao dai float by on bicycles; the tenacity and graciousness of the people we met; the culture of family that we seem to have lost here in the United States. But space is short and the other attribute I must mention again is Vietnam's ability to forgive. Every year at Tet, the New Year, the Vietnamese practice rituals to cleanse away previous slights and arguments, forgive transgressors, and start anew. It is the Vietnamese peoples' nature to forgive and move on. Some of that is rooted in the nation's predominant Buddhist faith, but even beyond that, forgiveness seems to be woven right into their DNA. As I wrote earlier, the Vietnamese forgave us long ago for the "American War," as they call it. For those who were alive then, that is considered the distant past. Vietnam has had a long history of battling invaders from the Chinese to the Cambodians. Conflict is nothing new to them. Once it's over, they've moved on down the road.

However, the past has not been so easy to forget for countless Americans who served during the Vietnam War. In recent years, hundreds have returned to the country. They make the long journey back for lots of different reasons, many attempting to put old ghosts to rest once and for all. One of those former vets is my friend, Steve Mariotti, who lives in University Place, Washington. Steve and his wife, Sharon, now sponsor an orphan from Haiphong and are big supporters of Son Michael Pham's "Kids Without Borders." From his unique perspective, I asked Steve if he would share his feelings about the country, and I can think of no better way to wrap up my final web log from Vietnam than with his words.

Thanks for reading, and here are some links if you'd like to do a little more exploring on your own:

For information on HumaniTours to Vietnam, orphanages, sponsoring a child, schools, donating time, money etc., go to : www.kidswithnoborders.org.

For information on how to combat human trafficking in the Mekong Delta: www.pacificlinks.org.

For information on Seattle's Sister City of Haiphong, Vietnam: http://www.haiphong.gov.vn/en/front-end/index.asp.

For information on the Greater Seattle Viet Nam Association: www.seattlevietnam.org.

For information about the Agent Orange problem: http://www.1.va.gov/agentorange/

MY VIETNAM EXPERIENCE
by Steve Mariotti

Last fall I took my second trip to Vietnam as a Rotarian with Son Michael Pham, a Rotarian and also founder of Kids Without Borders. Son Michael was our leader as we traveled through the country with 17 other folks including other Rotarians and Vietnam Vets. We visited orphanages from Hanoi to Saigon, a school just outside Hue built by Kids Without Borders and Rotary clubs, and delivered wheels chairs purchased by Kids Without Borders and Rotary Clubs through the Ken Behring Wheelchair Foundation, to handicapped children and adults in Da Nang. My first trip with Son Michael in the fall of 2002 was the first time back since 1966-67 when I was there with the Army as a company clerk. My experiences on these trips remind me 'one person can make a difference', especially when combined with the hearts and help of many other Rotarians, vets and others willing to give some of their time and talents. Besides bringing clothing, computers, and wheel chairs to those in need, we delivered a slew of smiles, endless embraces, and heaps of hugs. To say "we receive more than we give" is a cliché which understates the true benefits we derive from helping others.

As a former veteran, I felt some hesitation about returning to Vietnam and what kind of reception we would receive. However, I looked forward to seeing the country which is so beautiful, and experiencing the culture and people in a much better environment. I was surprised at how friendly the Vietnamese were to us, even the folks in the North. I was also pleasantly pleased at how well the Vietnamese people are doing and the progress they are making. Everyone seems happy, and there appears to be little poverty, and the majority are all working.

Emotionally, the most difficult part of the trip was visiting the Hoa La Prison Museum in Hanoi, and the Khe Sahn War Museum in Central Vietnam. Seeing the photos of our troops in prison, the body bags on the helicopter pads, and the biased comments against our soldiers in many of the photos, was very difficult. In the Khe Sahn museum guest book I wrote "God bless all those from both sides who died in this war for their beliefs and help us repair the damages to the families of all those involved." It was during my visit to Khe Sahn when a memory came back of seeing the bodies of my own friends and fellow soldiers from my infantry company, and I started crying. Although very emotional for me, this experience left me proud I was here in Vietnam helping others.

My experiences as an Army company clerk were very mild compared to those on the front lines being shot at, wounded and killed. The most difficult part of my job was identifying the bodies of my friends and fellow soldiers brought back to our base camp before being sent home.

I came away from my recent trips to Vietnam with both regrets and anger. Regrets because our involvement in Vietnam not only cost so many lives on both sides, but we undoubtedly held back the country from moving ahead and making political and economic progress, although the country seems to be doing well and moving ahead now. Yet, it is far from where it could be today.The period from 1975 when we left to about 1988 was one of severe economic distress and poor living conditions as a result of the government's harsh restrictions and refusal to relax controls on trade with other countries. After a lot of diplomatic efforts, trade with other countries opened up, and conditions started to improve for the people and the country.

My anger comes from seeing the devastating affects of Agent Orange, resulting in so many children ending up in orphanages because of severe health problems and deformities. Our U.S. government passed off this chemical as non toxic. And the unfortunate part is they denied for a long time the problems it was causing both to our troops and the people of Vietnam. The effects of Agent Orange in the ground and water tables is ongoing and will be for some time. And these ill health affects are being passed on to second and third generations, and may continue beyond that, we just don't know for sure.

The children in all the orphanages get an excellent primary and secondary education (the literacy rate in Vietnam is about 96%!!). But after High School, without help, it is most difficult for them to continue their education. Kids Without Borders has an excellent program to help these kids with continuing education, and at about $300 a year for college or vocational tuition, it is very reasonable. Sharon and I committed to Son Michael and Kids Without Borders before my trip last fall to help a child in the Hoa Phoung Orphanage in Hai Phong with his/her continuing education. Son matched us with a child needing help to attend a vocational school starting this spring/summer, and her name is Giang (see photo of Giang and me right after I met her last fall). Giang was 17 last October. Both her parents were killed in an electrical accident when she was very young (about 6, I believe).

One of the best ways to break the cycle of poverty anywhere in the world is education. Kids Without Borders offers the wonderful opportunity for Sharon and I to participate, and by providing Giang with a school scholarship, this gives her the chance for independence and a better life. Giang wants to attend the Culinary School in Hanoi and someday be a cook in hotel or large restaurant. Kids Without Borders and Son maintain control of the money ensuring it is used for her education and related expenses, and will monitor her progress and keep Sharon and I informed of how she is doing.

I don't know where Son gets the energy to do all he does for these kids in the orphanages, plus raising money to build schools, purchase wheel chairs through the Ken Behring Foundation for distribution and keep a lookout for some of the children needing extra help and attention. GOD BLESS HIM for all he is able to accomplish!!

Steve