Overwhelmed.

In a word, that describes how I've felt since the end of July.

That's when I was diagnosed with invasive lobular carcinoma in my right breast. When you're told you have cancer, the world seems to stop, like it's really not happening to you but to someone sitting just behind you in the room. There was no one sitting behind me. The doctor was talking to me.

The story starts in early July, when I saw a lump in my breast. I was getting undressed and just happened to look down. There it was. I didn't feel it, I SAW it! I started going back in my mind: how did I miss THIS?

How long has it been there?

After an ultrasound, a biopsy and the diagnosis I was told this type of cancer is "difficult to see" on a mammogram. What??!! I just figured because my 2007 and 2008 mammograms were 'fine' then I was fine. That wasn't the case. For me -- and for the many women I've talked with since -- mammograms may be a false sense of security. They are very important as part of your yearly exams but we also need to know our boobs! That's what I'm saying to anyone who will listen.

I can't tell you the number of women who've told me they rarely, if ever, do their self breast exams. You know all about it: the nurse asks you during your annual visit with your gynecologist, "are you doing your self breast exams?" I usually said, "well, kind of." In reality, I wasn't. I just didn't take the time.

That's no excuse -- it's imperative to know your breasts and talk to your doctor about any changes you are seeing or feeling.

Another thing I've learned is the Seattle area has one of the highest rates of breast cancer in the nation. One theory is that this could be due to a lack of Vitamin D (the sun). My oncologist tells me this hasn't been proven but just knowing this piece of information might urge you to talk to your doctor and get your Vitamin D level checked. If it is low you can decide whether you want to take a daily Vitamin D pill.

As far as what I'm going through: There have been lots of tests and even more waiting but I'm tackling this one day at a time. My first surgery was a lumpectomy August 19th but the pathology from that surgery found another lump in my right breast was also cancer. The recommendation was mastectomy on my right breast. If that wasn't hard enough, now I had to decide whether to remove my left breast too. There was no evidence of cancer in the left, but did I want to worry about that side for the rest of my life? After a lot of soul searching I decided to remove the left too.

That was about 3 weeks ago.

Since then I've been at home recovering and getting used to my short, short haircut. About a week before my double mastectomy I decided to take control and chop my hair. I have two young sons so I wanted them to get used to seeing me with short hair before it all falls out. And it will. I think my husband will be the one who shaves my head. We'll see how that goes. He's a Captain with the Everett fire department so the guys at his station are going to shave their heads in honor of me. I couldn't believe that when he told me. Guess who gets the honors? I do! I'll buzz the guys then my husband will buzz me! That will be October 16th. Pictures to come.

As I've recovered I've been spoiled by my KIRO-TV family. They are making my family meals, bringing cozy blankets, good books and emailing to cheer me up. I love them. So from KIRO to my neighbors to my wonderful friends and other cancer survivors I can't tell you how fortunate I feel to have them in my life and I'm sure going to need them: I start chemotherapy Monday, September 28th. I'm anxious because I really don't know how my body will react. I'm told everyone is different.

My chemo will last 5 months and will likely be followed by radiation. It's a long road but as a good friend and breast cancer survivor told me: this is a marathon not a sprint. I've never been a runner, but looks like I just started training!

More to come...... Michelle